Puppy-Dog Eyes for a Kitty

7 08 2008

About 4 months ago, I lost my cat. 

This week, almost every day, my 2-yr-old son has asked me if we can PLEASE go pick up Cedar at the doctor’s now.

First of all, I am surprised this boy even remembers the cat.  Secondly, I had thought he understood what had happened when Cedar died.  Finally, HOW DO I FIX THIS???

It breaks my heart when he gives me those eyes, and asks me that question…  It also stirs up my own grief, making me all sentimental and teary.  I’ve tried to explain death to him, but he insists on knowing where Cedar is and why we cannot go get him.  If anybody has any experiences or ideas that might help me get the message across to my son that Cedar is not coming home, please help!

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2 responses

7 08 2008
Noel

Hi Annie, I haven’t had to deal with this before too much, my kids seem to accept my answer of “I don’t know” when we talk about where someone goes when they die. But I had an idea for Malachi. It kind of sounds like he needs a more formal closure than just telling him that Cedar isn’t coming back (of course I don’t know if you’ve done that). Maybe have a little good-bye ceremony/party for your precious kitty. Do you still have any of his kitty items? You could even go as far as burying a kitty toy in the backyard, and then any time Mal wants to spend time with Cedar he can go visit that spot. I’d assume you have other cats, but maybe a new addition would distract him.

As far as how to make him understand what happened, I can’t be too much help there since I don’t really understand it myself.

Good Luck!
Noel

9 08 2008
thisiskristin

This must be so hard! We have not had to experience a family pet dying yet.

I would tell him in the kindest way that Cedar isn’t going to come back, because it was his time to go to kitty heaven. Then help him make something to remember the kitty by.

I’m so sorry about your cat!

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